Man oh man. I hate yelling at my kids (or anyone else)…so why do I do it?
Today we went to church and then came home to eat lunch. Now our Sundays are completely crazy, nuts, nerve wracking.. word it however you want. Compound that with the fact that my hubby was working (again). So, I’m “alone” with two kiddos.
Here’s our schedule.. we go to church, come home (usually) and eat, put the princess down for a nap, our small group from church comes over, wake up the princess from her nap, go back to church for practice with the kids program myself and my husband are involved in. Makes me tired just typing it. We don’t usually get home until 7. For us, seven is late to eat.
Today I decided to “plan” ahead. When we were getting ready to leave this morning, I peeled and chopped my onion, potatoes, and carrots for the meal. I forgot to get out the hamburger so it could thaw, but that’s why God invented microwaves, right? So, once we get home I thaw out the hamburger, get it cooking, and start the potatoes boiling. All this while I’m trying to straighten up my very messy kitchen and living room, feed my kiddos, and keep a shred of sanity. Oh wait, and I was eating carrots and dip (“lunch”).
Needless to say, pressure was high and when my princess asked for help getting bites I became a little upset. Then the second time she asked, four seconds later, and the third. I had to go to the pantry three times to figure out why I was in the pantry in the first place. BOOM.. I yelled.
I don’t know if anyone else is like this, but anger for me is like a volcano. I can feel it slowly start up, just gurgling deep down, then it starts to bubble, then bigger and bigger and BOOM.
I notice the volcano tends to get stirred up more easily when I’m trying to do something and things aren’t going as planned. Sometimes it’s when I don’t plan things out well, or expect too much of my kiddos.
Lots of verses swirl in my head. Everything from what Paul talks about wanting to do what’s right and not doing it to the verses that James talks about controlling my tounge.
I’ve talked to others who struggle with their anger, and I really don’t feel a big connection with them. Their kids are different ages than mine, or they struggle in so many other areas that the anger stuff is just one piece of the puzzle. So, am I alone? Does anyone else really feel this way too?
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